But I Am Not Small

“This fleshy frame may be small… but I am not small.

I am amazed at times… the shift that my body… that my mind… goes through. There are times that I believe, from a really deep place, that I can conquer the world [if I wanted to] and that I can do anything. And there are other times when I feel SO small… that I can barely move. It is time for me to step out of that smallness and step into the magnitude of who I am meant to be. Other people see it. Other people know it. Somehow, somewhere, along the way, I was put into a box that I have struggled to get out of.. for what feels like… my entire life.”

This blog post is a perfect example. I recorded this about 4 days ago… I remember recording it. I remember the feeling I had at the time… like it exists in some far away place I visited lifetimes ago. But as I listened to it this morning to write this post… that seems like a different person entirely.

I do not have the same sense of assuredness that I had 4 days ago. If I ask myself if I believe it… I can tap into that place that “knows” and I can answer truthfully that I do. I just don’t feel it the same way.

And if I am not careful and intentional about remembering this… I slip into the forgetting and become the person that is curled up in the fetal position… in the corner of that box I was put in so long ago.

That is how I will stay out of that fucking box!! Careful attention and intention. Reminders that I AM NOT SMALL when I am Being My True Self.

A teacher I heard speak this past week made an excellent point. We are unique beings in the world with unique gifts to share with the world, and therefore there can be no comparing ourselves to other beings. I paraphrase, but this was my take away. And its so true. Our society compares attributes or traits or behaviors…  and we take that to mean that we are lacking in some way. But that is only a part of who I am.

When it comes down to it… At any given moment… I already am the best Me I can be. I am constantly learning and growing, whether I recognize or acknowledge it, which means that I am “better” today than I was yesterday.

So, no more box for me. My destined path includes helping others find their destined path… to reconnect to their True Selves and the unique gifts that they brought with them on this earthly journey. Being My True Self has never felt better!!! I am honored and grateful to be on this journey beside you and am happy to serve you in every way that I can.

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I am on a journey .... By title I am a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor. I have been called friend, girlfriend, wife, mom... among other labels. But I am a loving, caring being that lives through these labels and titles to help and heal others while I am here.

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